The RMS Starmer was going round in circles, some crew trying to scuttle the ship, while the chief purser locked herself in her cabin: QUENTIN LETTS

More from Daily News

• Ant McPartlin gives viewers a health update 24 hours after sparking concern on I'm A Celebrity

• Lying Rachel finds her 'fall guy': OBR chief who exposed Chancellor's lies QUITS over shambolic leak of Budget  - but he's just being made a scapegoat to save her skin, insist Tories

• The town at war with developers over 'monstrous' warehouses: Families living in shadow of huge 60ft tall structures lose latest battle to halt construction

• I'm A Celeb's Vogue Williams becomes THIRD contestant voted out of the jungle after landing in the bottom with fellow model Kelly Brook - but husband Spencer Matthews is not there to greet her

• Teenage girl is dead and another seriously hurt after minibus crash: Woman, 40, is arrested

• Ex-England and Premier League footballer 'is arrested at airport on suspicion of attempted rape'

• Hollywood golden couple with 18 year age-gap spotted during rare outing... can you guess who these stars are?

• CCTV released after teenage girl 'is sexually assaulted on train'

• Kelly Brook clashes with ANOTHER I'm A Celeb campmate as she riles up Shona McGarty (and annoys viewers!) by calling her 'a lazy cow' and demanding she make lunch

• China poses 'a national security threat to the UK', Sir Keir Starmer warns

• Dick Van Dyke, 99, reveals all the weird jobs he took in his youth to get himself 'out of poverty'

• Ellie Goulding, 38, and Sienna Miller, 43, are pregnant! Stars are expecting with toyboy beaus as they BOTH reveal their baby bumps at the celeb-packed Fashion Awards

• Drunk, 34, who killed retired Army Sergeant in row over £5.49 chicken wings is jailed for four years and two months

• Olivia Attwood flashes her incredibly toned abs in a skimpy white co-ord at the Fashion Awards - just days after revealing she felt at 'death's door' with strep throat and flu

• Maya Jama leads the Fashion Awards Best Dressed in a shimmering midnight blue gown as Raye and Billie Piper dazzle in silver on the navy carpet

• Cyber Monday 2025 UK deals live: The best offers still on after Black Friday on big-name brands

• Coronation Street and Emmerdale cast scream for help after deadly pile-up as soap worlds collide in explosive first trailer for crossover episode Corriedale

• Revealed: Promising footballer, 14, was killed at level crossing rail safety bosses tried to CLOSE a day before tragedy

• Oprah sparks outrage over 'reckless' discussion about going 'no contact' with family members

• Pregnant Sienna Miller, 43, and boyfriend Oli Green, 28, put on a loved-up display after actress revealed couple are expecting their second child while debuting bump at Fashion Awards